Immigration to Absurdistan... a.k.a India or Bharat

To the east of Pakistan lies the land of Absurdistan, where I come from. It is also known as India or Bharat in some circles. Immigration process to this wonderful place is painful.

I recently went to the Chicago consultate to collect the approved Overseas Citizen of India (OCI) papers of my daughter. Now, OCI for the uninitiated, is the screwed up version of dual citizenship that India offers. Basically, they decided that dual citizenship as offered by other nations was no good and created something unique and messy. Anyway, having successfully got three OCIs I felt that I was good at getting it right even though each of the consulates have their own set of instructions on how to apply and no two of them match (my favorite is the sample photo...photos should have light background goes the instructions and the sample photo has a dark red/maroon background).

It used to be that Chicago consulate never accepted applications in person, it had to be mailed in. And, when you mail in you have to mail them "mailing fees", probably, for them to mail it back. Only issue here is they never mailed it back. I had to go in person to collect it all three times. So, this time I sent in the forms, money (two money orders - one for $275 and other for $20), tracked the application process on the web (one of the better aspects of the process. Once it gets to India it can be tracked) and went to collect it when the website indicated that it was back at the Chicago consulate. The consulate has a great atmosphere - a combination of being at a funeral + Chennai railway station - loads of grumpy people ready to kill waiting in a passive aggressive mode. I got to the consulate and hurried to the OCI window. Once I got there I was told that I had to get a token ( First indication of change). So, I went looking for a token vending machine. I could not find one. So, I went back to the guy who said I need to get a token to find out where to get it. He said, I had to stand in line at the first counter to get a token from the person there. Yes,"...stand in line to get a token." I did. Then, when I got back to the waiting area I noticed that others (most of them) were waiting to submit the forms. So, I told the guy who told me to get a token that I was here to collect the approved forms. He said that might be at a different time, so I should check with the person who gave me the token. So, I got back in line. The lady there said both submission and collection are handled by the same window. When I pointed out that they had just managed to make an already painful process even more painful, she pointed out that they had a process and had "dedicated" one window for just OCI processing. Given that it takes about 3 minutes per person waiting to submit and less than 30 seconds per person waiting to collect, I realized that I would have to wait for over 90 minutes to drop the US passport and then return to collect it with the stamped visa about 3 hrs later effectively forcing me to be off work for the afternoon. So, I decided to enlist the help of my wife whose office is closer to the consulate. She tried doing it by herself the next week, got there at 5 minutes after the window opens (11am) on a Friday only to find that tokens are given any time after the consulate opens. So, she had about 40 people in front of her. After waiting for 90 minutes she gave up. The week after we decided to make a joint effort, she would get the token as soon as the consulate opens, then I would get the token from her around the time the window open and drop off the US passport. Then, she would go back about 3 hrs later to collect it. This time it worked. We were licking our OCI wounds in satisfaction when we heard another absurd story.

My wife's cousin, who was born in the UK and is a British citizen is getting married in India in Dec. His dad and sibilings were having a hard time to get visas to go to India. They were told it would take upto 3 months to get their visas approved. The reason, the dad was born in Karachi back when the Brits ruled undivided India. It did not matter that he had never lived in Pakistan, the fact that he was born in mordern day Pakistan made him eligible for the special treatment that India reserves for its favorite cousins. Of course, it is not the first trip to India. In fact, one of his children who is being subject to the same absurb procedure was in India last Dec. Hey, this is a new year so the process has to be applied with new rigor. I some times wonder if the folks in Govt. of India/ the embassies and consultates of GOI are plain dumb or just acting dumb.

Two scarifices... one "progressive", other ancient

This weekend there were two stories about India that I ran into... both related to sacrifices.

The first one was the story of a alleged human sacrifice in a temple in West Bengal (Kingdom of Kalii, I can almost hear a Hollywood movie or Game with that name). I read about it first on the BBC and in the coming days was picked up by all and sundry in the Western world. Now, for the "progressive" sacrifice.

The other one was the Indian Premier League (IPL. Think NFL for Cricket) ownership controversy that involved Shashi Tharoor, Indian Minister of State for External Affairs. Tharoor has been one of the well known indian faces in the West - as part of the Indian UN mission, as deputy to Kofi Annan, and a reasonably successful author. Tharoor started this one off by saying something to the effect that the powers to be wanted the new IPL franchise to go to some other city, not Cochin. Now, this was not the first time that he had suffered from "tweet in mouth" disease. Somehow, this might be his last. Turns out that the Congress party, his party, feels he is an embarrasment by his actions and the fact that he does not deny his association with part owner of the Cochin franchise. So, they want him to "resign voluntarily." Now, for Congress party to feel embarrased must be a great deal for this is the party that did not feel any embarrasement about the Shah Bano case, or the Bofors arms scandal or its ministers involvement in the riots and killing that followed the assasination of then Prime Minister Indira Gandhi. Cricket, I guess is more important than all of that.

I have no sympathy for Tharoor's state (or, the state that he represents in the Parliament). Tharoor turned out be a bureacrat turned politician with great education but very little street smartness - an embarrasment to the Great Indian Political Establishment. Tharoor can go back to writing. That might be a better way to serve India. BTW, Indian foreign service establishment (not specifically, IFS) seems to be better at producing authors than statesman. I know of three decent ones - Shashi Tharoor, Pavan Varma and Vikas Swarup. As for Tharoor, I hope I get a chance to run into him in the state that I call "God's own hell's hole."

Taking our tax dollars for a ride with Santa

On paper there is separation of state and religion in the US. In reality the state policies are strongly influenced by the views of the major religion (example, abortion and gay rights). Come November/ December evidence of state support for religion emerges as different local governments spend tax dollars in putting up Christmas wreaths, decorations and lights.

Today, after being in Chicago for 11 years I chanced upon an interesting way to take our tax dollars for a ride... with Santa. Yes, I am talking about the Chicago Transit Authority's annual Santa trains. I had seen posters for the same previous years but never did I imagine that it would be such a big affair. The entire train was decked with lights - inside and out. Gone are the usual advertisements, replaced by corny jokes about Christmas. Even the seat covers were different - not the usual blue but the Christmas green and red with Santa/ trees and elves. The driver mentioned that it was the 18th year that the CTA was doing this and no other metropolitan transport authority does anything like this. Now, that is a dead give away on the merits of this promotion. If the idea has not caught on in 18 years it is a really bad idea. I am sure CTA authorities will spin this as a service that brings immeasurable joy to its riders. I am sure its riders (including me) will agree that we will be more joyful if the transport authority was in green, fares are not increased every year (how do they manage to remain in red even after increasing fares every year? they are not the only ones... usps is in the same position) the cars were clean, tracks were upgraded and the trains ran on time. It should not take 40 minutes to travel about 6 miles during rush hour. The suburban rail service, Metra, does 36 miles in that time.

Enjoy the photos of our tax dollars going on a ride with Santa.








BTW, my wife who took the regular train coming behind the holiday service somehow ended up ahead of me.

High Rate of H-1B Visa Fraud says BusinessWeek

High Rate of H-1B Visa Fraud - BusinessWeek

So, where is the news? What is new? The article is written in such a way that it makes you think that the companies using the H1-B program the most (i.e. Indian companies) are the ones most responsible for fraud without making explicit claims or citing evidence.

The story for H1-B folks being paid less than market rate is often quoted but hard to substantiate. The market rate is not a single figure but a range and I bet every one of these H1-B folks fall within the range. The companies that employ H1-B folks benefit financially without having to resort to lower wages. Most H1-B folks tend to amass their vacation for one large vacation trip. That makes it easy for companies to plan for their absence. Quite often these vacations happen between Thanksgiving and Christmas, when majority of the companies do not have any major initiatives happening. Then, there is the wait for "green card" which makes these folks bonded laborers to these firms without having to sign such an employement contract. And, finally, there is the Social Security taxes that these folks contribute but may not see unless they become a citizen and Social Security program is still solvent.

So, who is being had, by whom?

Smoking ban will paint the town(s) red...literally

BBC NEWS | South Asia | Indian ban on smoking in public

This is a great idea for the cops to make some extra money on the side (not that they did not have options to do it). I also think this will make people switch to domestic alternatives like chewing tobacco with betel leaves. Hey, smokeless tobacco is big business worldwide. Altria (i.e. Philip Morris in its new avatar) recently bought UST Inc. (US Tobacco).

Yet another bomb blast...what is the big deal?

Yesterday, it was Delhi's turn. Not that it never had its chance before. And, nor did it have to wait for too long. Every time a bomb goes off (these days it seems to be a few at the same time. Can we call that "progress?”) the reactions are pretty much the same.

The leaders of the government wag their fingers say something like "... this cannot break our resolve... we are committed to being secular...we will catch the perpetrators." They used to blame the "foreign hand" and ISI. That has reduced a bit these days since we no longer need to "import" this expertise but have managed to develop a large pool of well-trained resources with local and foreign expertise.

The leaders of the various political parties point fingers at each other, blame it on "minority" / or, "majority" appeasement, failure to implement anti-terror laws like POTA/TADA or, the implementation of it as the cause.

The leaders of the police claim almost immediately that they have strong/ vital leads. Now, don't ask how they who were totally clueless about the blasts suddenly have strong leads to solve it.

The media expresses outrage, sheds crocodile tears, and waits for the next big thing to increase their circulation or rating. And, the people carry about their daily lives as if this is something they expect in regular intervals.

Why is it that there is no sustained effort at all levels (from individual citizens to the leaders of the government) to tackle the problem head-on? Or, have we succumbed to the "karma" concept and think that we "deserve" this? Unless people of all walks of lives and political colors take to the streets and make an issue of this and keep it sustained there will be no political will. The politicians are so wrapped in figuring out how to complete the current term and possibly win the next term that they do not care a bit about the country or its citizens. The law and order establishment does things to the bidding of their political masters. So, little wonder that those "strong leads" do not resolve the case in the next five years. And, if they manage to "solve" then the judgment is still reserved. As for the media, they will only focus on stuff that bring them revenue/ ratings - things that keep the interest of the public for long time. Little wonder why cricket is discussed and shown a lot more than anything of importance to the society and the nation.

Durbin's "windfall profit tax" is a lot of hot air

Senior Senator Dick Durbin of IL has proposed something called a "windfall profit tax" to cap the profits of oil companies and help ease the burden on the public reeling under the pressure of high gas prices. Now, what constitutes as "windfall profit"? Who will define that? And, why restrict it to just oil companies? Why not apply this to all companies? It would be interesting to see how this will apply to software companies after all the incremental cost of a software product is close to zero.

Why can't the good senator and his likes think of things that make sense and are within their control like improving the public transportation infrastructure (rather than giving free rides to senior citizens and the homeless) or increasing the fuel efficiency requirements on vehicles. Heck, all those require time, effort and will not have the same effect on the public as "windfall profit tax". We all need someone to be the "bad guy" and it is easy to paint the oil companies (and, in other occasions, the Chinese companies) as the "bad guys."

I guess it is guys like Senator Durbin who make sure that Chicago's legacy as "the windy city" lives on. Got to love him for that.

Only in India

BBC NEWS | South Asia | India promises to protect writer

As if we do not have enough troubles of our own and from others who are hell bent on causing trouble (read our negihbourhood terrorist organizations and states) we go around inviting trouble.

Why on earth should India host a non Indian whose presence is causing trouble. Let us not say that it is for freedom/ rights and similar blah... blah. Why is the Indian tax payer paying for a foreigner's stay in the country when there are enough and more indians who would like their government provide them enough to live? And, what is the total economic cost of this person's stay?

Maybe, the government views it this way - "We have a whole lot of Bangladeshis living here illegaly, so one more does not change the statistics much." I think even one is one too many.

Adam's bridge and monkey business

BBC NEWS | South Asia | Offer to quit in India gods row

One more of the comical episodes that color many development projects in India. I bet the guys protesting the creation of the canal are not from south tamilnadu. I bet most of them have not been to south tamilnadu and good number of them have not heard of ramesvaram. Of course, you do not need to know all these to protest on "matters of religious bearing". And, then the government (like all "secular" indian governments) tables a report questioning the existence of "Ram" (wonder if they would do similar reports questioning if "jesus" and "muhammed" ever lived). And, of course, the report has no bearing on the project. The project has to be assessed and communicated to people on its merits not on the existence of "Ram". Amidst, all this minister Ambika Soni offers to resign - great! Does that change anything related to the project?

So, why not try to communicate the details of the project - its merits and costs to people close to the site and affect by the project in simple terms. Now, that is not as difficult as proving the existence or non-existence of "Ram".

Embarrassed by an anthem? There are other reasons to be embarrassed

BBC NEWS | South Asia | Infosys boss makes anthem apology

NRN (a.k.a BillG of Bangalore) feels that singing the national anthem would "embarass foreigners". I guess, he would know. If he is embarassed he should say so. It is interesting how some people can't get over the colonial bueracrat mentality. And, they are talking of making him the President. Contrast this with Jindal who fought to get private companies right to fly Indian flag.

Now, there are a lot of other reasons to be rightly embarassed of. For example, Infosys and other Indian software firms still seek tax advantages from the government. Or, how Infosys in particular gets the government to allocate land at lot less than market prices so that its employees can work in fancy campuses.

The Indian National anthem would have served as a good geography lesson for the foreigner. Afterall, it was created for a foreigner (George V coronation).

P.S: I think the new Indian government rules requiring women civil servants to provide details of their menstrual cycles must have been written by a dick head. Equality demands that men provide details of when they shagged.

The epidemic of "Therapeutic alienation" in India

Last weekend I watched a very interesting interview on PBS. John McWhorter, the author of "Winning the Race" talked about what is wrong with welfare and black empowerment. He described "the heroics of idle protest and theatrical rage" that characterize today's black leadership as "therapeutic alienation."

He says ..."therapeutic alienation: alienation unconnected to, or vastly disproportionate to, real-life stimulus, but maintained because it reinforces one's sense of psychological legitimacy, via defining oneself against an oppressor characterized as eternally depraved."

It was an ah-ha moment for me. I finally have a term for what desis from M.K. Gandhi to today's leaders indulge in. Ok, I am sure the reference to Gandhi will draw criticism from some quarters. But, think. Did Gandhi care more about winning independence or proving the British as morally inferior? And, today we have people of all kinds indulging in similar behavior (though their morals, inf any, are really low).

Now, there is a new report that was leaked in sync with the Uttar Pradesh elections that finds Indian muslims that worse off than other religious groups. It is a call for religion based reservations. This is when about 75% of indian muslims are covered by existing caste based reservations. So, on one hand we have this high sounding concepts like secularism, equality and equal opportunity while on the other hand we have government policies that promote division. How long before the shias, sunnis and other groups all ask for their own quotas?

Finally!!!

UP court stays subsidy to Haj pilgrims

It took a while for someone to go to court on this. And, it took a right wing hindu organization symapthizer to do it. But, what the court has ruled is absolutely right. A secular state has no business supporting its people's religious trips.

Oil for food and food for thought

Report implicates Indian ex-official - Asia - Pacific - International Herald Tribune

So, the official report of the indian study to investigate on the allegations made by Paul Volcker's report is out. Actually, it has been "leaked". According to it the Congress party is not to be blamed but Natwar Singh and his son is at fault. If you recall Volcker's report had listed both the Congress party and Natwar Singh. Natwar used the leaked indian report to claim his innocence. He says since the report clearly states that he did not monetarily benefit from it he is innocent. And, of course, Congress party says the report vindicates them, too.

Here is the deal guys. Saddam would not have dealt with Natwar Singh had it not been for the fact that this joker was a member of the Indian government, a Congress government. And, our democracy is supposed to be an example of collective responsibility. So, Congress cannot say that they are innocent. And, Natwar can't say he is innocent because he did not gain from it. Even Robinhood who robbed the rich to give to the poor did rob. He did break the rule of the land. And, Natwar is no Robinhood. He is, just like many others, another ordinary criminal who gets elected to the Indian Parliament.

New face of terror and new realities to face

India police detail role of militants in attacks - Asia - Pacific - International Herald Tribune

Reports from police investigating the latest Bombay blasts indicate one of the ringleaders was a muslim software engineer who until recently was working for a large multi-national. Now, this is not the first time that folks involved in terror/ anit-social activities have come from such a background. But, often this is not the background that is associated with terror, especially in India.

The story always is - the person felt marginalized, did not have access to opportunities, was in a financially weak situation etc...It is almost as if with all such conditions it was "natural" for them to go and blow up innocent people. And, so what does the government do - offer more handouts to the marginalized communities around election time.

Now, it is clear that there are factors other than economics or revenge at work. The only way I can explain this is - religion. These people feel that their religion is better than others and so everyone should either join me or die.

The DH Imam wasted no time in absolving LeT and blamed it on the hindu radicals. He claims he has information to that effect. And, he continues "We were rulers here for 800 years. Inshaallah, we shall return to power here once again". This guy is not some fringe radical. He is the religious head of one of the biggest mosques in India and is a well known religious leader. And, this is not the first time he has indulged in such statements.

It is time for the so called "secular" indians and political parties to determine if they want to be an Islamic nation. And, have no doubts this won't be the second coming of the Mughal dynasty.

I guess what we need is not new anti-terror laws like TADA, POTA etc... We need a law that make any attack on the secular nature of the nation a crime. That way we can throw the hindu radicals, muslim radicals and prostelizing missionaries all behind bars.

PS: Why is that many Islamic radical groups have words "democratic", "freedom" etc... in their names?